Can Manly Men Sing in Church?

I think with the modern church worship movement, the singing time of our worship has gotten a sort of feminine rep. People sing songs like “God I love you. Wrap me in your embrace. Hold me. I feel your beauty, I want to touch you, etc.” And what does that make you do as a man? What response does that generate?  You’re like… “um Na I don’t like that. That’s girly.”

Now, “worship” is way more than the song portion of our church service. It’s a lifestyle of ascribing worth to God. Worship is the act of pointing to Gods infinite glory and power and wonder and love in everything we do. But I want to redefine how we do that in song as men..how manly, godly men are to act when singing in a worship service.

  1. The awesomeness and majesty and beauty of God is NOT girly or weak.
    • God is powerful. He is mighty. He created the universe, the earth, and everything in it. He’s full of wonder and mystery and splendor. But for some reason, the church has labeled those thoughts feminine. It’s been said the church has had too much mothering and not enough fathering. Even the image of Jesus has been transformed (in ignorance) into some pretty boy with luscious brown locks. Jesus was never like that! He was a man! Bearded and calloused. Our Lord is strong and mighty. He worked, he got his hands dirty. So we can say “Jesus is mighty, he is majestic and wonderful”, and we can say it like men.
    • Bragging on how huge and powerful something is isn’t lame. It’s appropriate. You look at the grand canyon and think, “wow, that’s amazing”. How much more so is God? How much more worthy is the creator than the creation.
    • We also have to correct our thoughts about certain terms.  The term “Beauty” is used a lot in the psalms to refer to God. But it doesn’t have to be a feminine term. It’s a great way to describe how perfect and flawless God is.
      • How many of you ever build something and finish and you’re like “oh yea… that is beautiful”?
      • Or maybe a brand new Corvette, or a the most powerful powertools on the market, those things are beautiful right? I see a Rickenbacker 330 guitar and I’m like “You are beautiful indeed”…
      • So it’s not just a romantic term is it? We have to stop treating it that way. His love for us is beautiful. The way he’s made creation is beautiful. It’s flawless, it’s perfect.
  2. Refusal to publicly proclaim God’s praises is deeply rooted in PRIDE 
    • Now I don’t think men see Gods attributes as weak… but its the thought of making ourselves look weaker by pointing out his strength that hinders us.
    • The refusal to praise him is straight pride and nothing else! You want to be strong, you want to be THE MAN. And talking about how small you are compared to God doesn’t pump you up.  But If you’re a christian, you MUST get passed your PRIDE and give God credit for how great he is. That doesn’t make you weak… it makes you smart, and it pleases God.
    • So we need to ask ourselves… Is our response to God held back by pride? Because you don’t want to look weak or vulnerable?
    • We have to remember God commands humility. Scripture says over and over that he honors and blesses the humble. But he despises the proud. He turns from the arrogant.
  3. True worship in song does not have to be emotional, but it should not be guarded.
      • We sing in an atmosphere designed to keep your focus, to help you keep your thoughts on God and what you’re singing. But it doesn’t have to be an emotional moment. There is no scripture that defines singing worship songs as big tear-fests where all the men in the room are weeping.
      • If it is, if the thought of surrendering to God’s faithfulness in a time of hardship brings true emotions out of you, that’s perfectly ok. God desires authentic response, and authentic response is good and necessary to strengthen our faith. Letting our guard down helps us to hold on to God and his promises throughout life. It does nothing for us and nothing for God when we harden our thoughts during worship. God seeks a broken and contrite heart.
  4. God’s love for us is not romantic, neither should our response to that love be.
    • “LOVE” was created by God first. But society has put a weird spin on it. Love these days is seen mostly as Romantic Love. And even love between man and woman has been over-romanticized, leading to a lot of misconceptions about the reality of marriage.
    • True Love is devotion that prompts action. It is unconditional and unwavering. And that’s the love God has for us. He’s devoted to us as a creator is to his creation.
    • So Be secure in your response to that love.
      • Because there is nothing stronger than Him. There is nothing we can put our stock in that’s greater than His power. There’s nothing mightier than Him. There is no one on earth or in heaven who loves you more than the Father does.
      • Look at it this way…Does the loyal army feel weird about shouting praise to the king they serve? Neither should we about our king.
  5. True worship in song is thoughtful and deliberate.
    • What are you thinking when we sing? Anything? Maybe you’re thinking of the people around you, maybe looking at the drummer or the people around you. You might be worrying about whether someone can hear you sing, or you may be thinking about how bad your wife’s voice is.
    • When we sing, we should be focusing on the truths of God, His faithfulness, His strength in our weakness, His sacrificial unending love for us. We need to actually say the lyrics to God, proclaiming those truths over the situations in our own lives. It benefits neither side when we sing words we don’t give a second thought.
    • TRY THIS… Next time, during the service, sing the songs as if you’re having a conversation with God, like it’s a prayer instead of a song. I promise you will be blessed by it.
  6. How we worship influences our families.
      • We can mislead our kids in 2 ways by how we act in a worship setting.
        • We lead them to believe corporate worship singing is important, but that it’s meant to be an emotional and romantic moment.
        • OR we lead them to believe corporate worship isn’t important.
      • You know your kids watch you do everything. Do you want them to think you’re a hypocrite because you talk about God, but when it comes to expressing his glory in worship, you just stand there stoic? They see how excited you get about baseball, football, and soccer games, but when it comes to God, it’s like you’re not moved at all. They think, well is God important? Is he real? Do we really need him? Because my dad doesn’t seem like it.

    As the spiritual leaders and influencers of our wives and children, we HAVE TO SHOW them how a strong christian sings to the Lord. With thoughtfulness and sincerity. With pride in our God and humility in ourselves.


I promise this to my church:

* I will NEVER lead a coed service in feminine, ooey gooey worship.
* I will not bring to the church songs that depict a romantic relationship between the worshiper and God, BUT RATHER a deep adoration of God’s greatness and love.

If you feel like I have, come talk to me about it and we’ll discuss it. You may point out something to me that I’ve overlooked. Or I may have some valuable insight for you.

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